Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Babies really are hedonistic

I've gone through many changes in my life, moving, graduation, first job, college, and marriage to name a few. What I've discovered is what any parent already knows, nothing, nothing at all prepares you for having a newborn.

On July 23 at 8:11am my beautiful baby daughter Payton was born.(that's a whole other story) I have discovered that life as I knew it has ceased to exist. I do love being a mom, she's beautiful and precious, but let's face it she's also a hedonistic little creature. All she wants is a full belly, a warm body to use as a pillow, someone to change her diaper and occasionally something new to look at. I always wanted a cuddly baby and my o my did I get my wish. You really need to be careful what you wish for. Just try to put her down and you will hear complaint. I feel sometimes that I am going insane.

On my most recent trip to my midwife I broke down and admitted that Payton wasn't a perfect little angel(I'm quite a perfectionist and this wasn't easy) and could her fussy crying be something I'm causing. What I was told was that she was a High Needs Baby. Yes Yes all babies have a lot of needs but this is a whole new category. If she's awake she wants body warmth and movement, non stop bouncing, dancing, jiggling, tossing, patting, swaying, and any other movement you can come up with. What gets me is it doesn't stop when she's asleep, while she doesn't generally require movement to stay asleep she will and does wake is you try to put her down. Sometimes I can sneak her into her swing for a few moments rest.

Some of you will undoubtedly tell me we've just spoiled her, and I might have agreed with you before her birth. She has been like this from the time we were in the hospital. So we do what every parent does, we cope, and we pray. I'm very sure God meant for us to have this exact baby girl because he knows we have the patience to get through this.

Don't get me wrong my husband and I love her so much it's hard to imagine loving her any more, and not all the time spent with her is rough, I can't imagine her not being here. She has started smiling and it just melts my heart. I'm trying really hard to enjoy every minute of her being so small because she is growing so fast and pretty soon I'll have a teenager who thinks she hates me because I won' t let her wear a miniskirt and stay out till midnight.

Anyways I was just going to write a quick little blurb to get me started with this blogging thing but Rod's got Payton so I took advantage of the moment, who knows when I'll get the next chance to write. That's enough of a rant for now.